Disclaimer: I want to be the meat in a Jack/Daniel sandwich...or at least the condiment.
By The Huntress
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"OW!" Teal'c grimaced, as he bit into the Kit-Kat bar. "O'Neill, I believe this bar is stale. It is painful to bite it."
"Since when do you eat candy Teal'c?" Daniel asked.
Teal'c smiled at his recently 'descended' brother-in-arms. "When you...left us...Daniel, I found it to be a source of comfort."
"Yeah," Daniel agreed, "chocolate is Grade-A comfort food. The best."
"Nah," Jack shook his head, handing Teal'c a Hershey bar. "Twinkies are tops."
"AHHH!" Teal'c screamed, throwing the candy bar so hard, it smashed the glass on General Hammond's office door.
The General, who was in a meeting with Major Carter and Jonas Quinn, just raised an eyebrow at the three men standing outside his door. He glanced down and nonchalantly picked up the candy bar which had landed on his desk. This was the SGC after all. Strange and unusual happenings were common place.
"I prefer Three Musketeers myself, if you must know."
"You would sir?" Jonas jumped to his feet. "I'll go get you one."
"Jonas," General Hammond sighed, "you can stop brown-nosing. Since you have finally obtained a driver's license, your car requisition came through."
"He got a car?!" Jack asked. "What did ya get?"
"'66 Mustang convertible, dark blue." Jonas nodded in satisfaction. "Now I can take myself to those places you told me about. Finally, after all this time, I can get me a piece of...."
"Pie!" Jack interjected quickly. "He likes pie. I gave him the names of a few diners."
"I'll just bet you did Jack," the general replied, raising an eyebrow at him. "Jonas, you need to be careful about some of these...diners the colonel told you about."
"He didn't tell me about diners sir." Jonas grinned stupidly. "He gave me the names of a few strip clubs and a few phone numbers too."
"Shut up Jonas!" Jack snapped, shaking his head. For a veritable genius, the guy sure was an idiot sometimes.
"O'NEILL!" Teal'c growled, holding his jaw.
"Hey, T, what's the matter?" Jack rushed to his side, arm around his friend. "Talk to me buddy." Jack began to rub slow circles over Teal'c's back.
"I do not know." Teal'c took a deep breath. "It is gone now." He stood straight again, meeting the General's eyes. "General Hammond, I must apologize for breaking your door."
"I didn't know a Hershey bar was a lethal weapon," Sam snickered.
"You might as well come in," George said, "and explain to me what happened."
The three men entered, Jack and Daniel both stifling laughter as the rest of the glass fell to the floor.
Teal'c once again met Hammond's eyes. "I bit into a candy bar and felt an unusual pain in my mouth. I have never experienced such pain."
"T," Jack was rubbing Teal'c back again, "have you ever been to the dentist?"
"I do not have such a need, O'Neill. My symbiote takes care of my health. What it cannot do, Doctor Frasier takes care of."
"Teal'c, you have *no* idea of how painful this can become," Daniel said, shaking his head.
"There is no need for a dentist. I shall take care of this myself." Teal'c nodded to them and headed to his quarters to meditate.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Doctor Liedercos was new to the SGC but had been in the Air Force for thirty years. He had dealt with all kinds of oral maladies, but nothing prepared him for the huge man that entered his office. Well, entered was not quite the right word. The man, who looked quite imposing, was being dragged by two men, and pushed by a blonde woman.
"C'mon Teal'c, stop being a baby," Daniel grunted, tugging on Teal'c's left arm.
"You don't flinch when the Goa'uld attack," Jack pointed out, pulling the right arm.
"NO!" Teal'c snapped. "I do not want to do this. I am telling you, my symbiote can take care of it."
"T," Jack sighed, "we've been waiting for Junior to take care of this for four days now."
"You cannot make me do this O'Neill." Teal'c threw the other three aside and turned around. "I am going back to my quarters and Kel-No-Reem. That should alleviate the problem."
Jack, Daniel, and Sam all looked at each other and nodded. Daniel and Sam each grabbed an arm and Jack shoved Teal'c into the examining room. Daniel stuck out his foot, tripping Teal'c, sending the Jaffa straight into the chair.
"Don't move!" Jack warned in his command voice. Even Teal'c was not immune to that tone. Actually, no one was, or ever had been, with the exception of Daniel.
The dentist did an examination of the Jaffa, taking x-rays and poking in Teal'c's mouth. "Mister Teal'c, you have a cavity. But don't worry. We'll take care of it today."
Teal'c actually whimpered when he saw the syringe headed for his mouth.
"Aww T," Jack soothed, "relax. It's only a novocaine; just a quick pinch then you're all done."
"NO!" Teal'c pursed his lips.
"Open wide Teal'c," Daniel encouraged.
Teal'c shook his head in defiance.
"Maybe we can do this another time," Doctor Liedercos suggested.
"No way," Jack replied. "Four days we've been listening to him bitch over his mouth. I even went so far as to ask Jacob if there was anything he can do."
"What did he say?" Sam asked.
"He and Selmac both said no," Jack replied. "And I could swear they were *both* being sarcastic about it."
"Jacob and Selmac?" The dentist asked.
Jack nodded to him. "You've got security twelve clearance right?" A nod. "Okay then. Jacob is Major Carter's dad. He shares his body with Selmac, who belongs to a race called the Tok'ra."
"A race. As in...non-human?"
"Yeah," Jack said. "Weren't you briefed about the SGC?"
The dentist shook his head, wondering if this base was populated by the 'section eighter's'.
"Don't believe in guys from other planets huh?"
Another shake of the dentist's head.
Jack smirked. "T, introduce Doctor Liedercos to Junior."
"NO!" Daniel and Sam both shouted.
"Aww, c'mon," Jack smirked. "Let's give the dentist a nice warm welcome to the SGC."
"O'Neill, perhaps that is *not* the best idea."
"Okay," Jack shrugged. "Now Teal'c, you need to open your mouth and let the dentist numb you." Teal'c pursed his lips again. "Alright, enough of this shit. You either open your mouth willingly or I zat you. Either way, you're getting that cavity filled."
"You would zat me O'Neill?" Teal'c actually pouted. "After all we have been through? Are we not friends, brothers, comrades-in-arms? Have we not fought at each other's sides, been injured for one another? Did we not team-up at Jell-O wrestling to win first prize?"
Jack rolled his eyes. "OPEN YOUR DAMNED MOUTH!"
Teal'c did as he was told, and ripped the arm off the chair when he got the injection.
The dentist finally finished, and examined the other three. "Major Carter, Doctor Jackson, your teeth are in excellent condition. You both brush and floss every day from what I can see." He paused. "Colonel O'Neill, you have two cavities."
"And?" Jack asked.
"We'll fill them today and you should have no problems...as long as you brush and floss on a regular basis."
"Okay," Jack nodded. "Let's do it." He got into the chair, eyes wandering to the dentist, who had a syringe. Jack jumped up. "Uh-uh! Just drill."
"Colonel, if I don't numb you, you are going to be in a lot of pain."
"Doc," Jack smirked, "I've been taken over by aliens, nearly died in outer space, and been tortured by Jonas Quinn's explanation of Naquadariah do's and don'ts. I don't want one!"
"Do not be a baby O'Neill," Teal'c smirked. "It is 'only a novocaine'."
Jack gave Daniel a shy smile. "Hold my hand Danny?" The smile Jack got back made his heart skip a beat. He knew it was only for him; no one else got a smile like that from Doctor Jackson. Nope. Only Colonel Jonathan O'Neill. Jack always felt special and honored to see that look.
Daniel took Jack's hand in his, the doctor leaned over with the needle, and shot Jack up with novocaine. Daniel screamed from the pain in his hand and Teal'c lifted the dentist by his shirt, dangling him a foot off the ground.
"You have harmed Daniel. I must kill you now."
"I didn't touch him!" Doctor Liedercos whimpered.
"You caused O'Neill pain, which caused Daniel pain. Same thing. Anyone who harms DanielJackson dies a slow and *very* painful death."
"Teal'c put him down," Daniel said softly.
"No."
"Teal'c," Sam said sweetly, "if you put the nice dentist down, I'll bake you another strawberry shortcake."
Teal'c thought for a moment, then dropped the dentist on his ass. He fixed him with a glare. "I will stay here and ensure you give O'Neill no pain. Any pain caused to O'Neill warrants a slower and more painful death."
Jack nodded. "Tho there," he lisped, the novocaine taking hold.
"You lithped," Daniel teased.
"Dnny, cm hre n thay 'at," Jack muttered, mouth numb.
"Uh-uh. It's only your mouth that's numb. You'll hit me."
Jack nodded.
Daniel chuckled. "C'mon guys, let's get out of here. He'll be okay Teal'c. He was Black Ops fer cryin' out loud! They thrive on pain." He pushed Sam and Teal'c out the door, shutting it behind them, giving Jack the most loving and tender smile he could give, "You didn't think I'd leave Jack, did you?" and was pleased to see it returned.
"Thank you for getting...Mister Teal'c...away from me." The dentist was preparing the drill.
"Uh, Doctor Liedercos?" Daniel smiled. "If Jack feels pain...I'll let him take care of you himself later." Daniel's smile became a smirk. "Black Ops. Can kill a man nine ways with a soup spoon. And you don't want to know what he can do with an egg beater. Trust me."
The dentist nodded, started the drill, and moved it to Jack's mouth. Jack's eyes widened and Daniel had to bite back a giggle. 'Damn, he doesn't flinch when people shoot him or torture him. But one look at a dentist's drill and he's terrified.' Aloud, "Jack, it'll be alright. I'll stay right here."
"Prmise?"
"I promise Jack."
"'Kay. Hld hnd agin Danny?"
Daniel once again took Jack's hand in his, biting back another laugh; Jack O'Neill, his brave-hearted lover, terror of the SGC, feared by various alien races, killer of System Lords.
Jack O'Neill...afraid of the dentist.
Twenty minutes later, Daniel's hand was slightly swollen, the big bad colonel was near tears, and Doctor Liedercos was thinking that maybe he should have stayed in DC.
"Cn go now?" Jack muttered.
"Yes, Colonel, you can go."
He opened the door and Sam and Teal'c stumbled in.
"He's okay guys," Daniel smiled. "He'll live."
Daniel didn't see the smirk Jack gave Teal'c, nodding to his abdomen.
Teal'c nodded his head, waited until Jack and Daniel were out of sight, then faced the dentist. "I would like you to meet...'Junior'."
Doctor Liedercos promptly fainted.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"When are we leaving?" Jack asked, the novocaine wearing off. Since they came in together, they had to leave together. And Daniel seemed to be taking forever on a piece of parchment.
"Soon Jack. I promise."
Jack sat down, busying himself with a few things Daniel left on the table for him to touch; things that wouldn't upset Daniel if Jack broke them. Not that he'd ever broken anything. After twenty minutes he was bored. "Can we leave now?"
"I'm not done yet. SG7 needs this done before they return to P3R-981. Have some patience."
"You sound like my mother," Jack muttered. He picked up the latest issue of Archaeology Today, and skimmed through it. "Do you have anything else to read?"
"Yes Jack." Daniel smiled, reached into his drawer, and pulled out the latest issue of All About Beer and the newest Smith & Wesson catalogue. 'That should keep him busy for a while,' Daniel thought, going back to his parchment.
Jack, however, was getting antsy. "I wanna go *now* Danny."
"Jack, you sound like a six year old. We'll leave as soon as I'm...."
"No. Now."
"I'm almost done."
"NOW!"
Daniel stood up, slamming his palm onto the desk, taking a deep breath before opening his mouth. Jack could be a petulant child sometimes. If he didn't love Jack so much...."Okay Jack," he said through gritted teeth. "We'll go now."
Jack pouted. "Hurts."
Daniel finally looked up from his parchment, heart melting at the look on Jack's face; the older man was in pain. "Aww Jack...."
"Really hurts."
Daniel couldn't help the smile. He stood, placing a finger under Jack's chin, lifting it. "It's okay." He leaned in for a soft kiss, and the moment he pressed his lips to Jack's, Jack groaned, and stepped back.
"Kiss hurts."
Daniel shut down his computer. "Kissing your mouth hurts. I'll kiss something else when we get home and make you forget all about the evil dentist."
"Kiss it now," Jack pouted again, knowing what that look did to Daniel. "I'm in a lot of pain." Jack reached out, taking Daniel's glasses off, laying them on the desk.
Daniel shifted back, untucking Jack's shirt, sliding his hands up Jack's chest. He pulled Jack's shirt up, leaning down to attack a nipple, sucking and nipping it.
"That's good, just like that...." Jack moaned, cupping the back of Daniel's head.
"You used to get angry if I even thought about sex on base." Daniel moved to the other nipple, gently laving it.
"That was before you...ascended. When I didn't think I'd see you again, it seemed like a stupid rule. I mean, we were both confined to base for two days before Kelowna. I could have been making love to you for all that time."
Daniel slid his hand over Jack's crotch. "Anxious Jack?"
"Danny...."
Daniel continued his maddening caresses, pulling Jack's hand away as Jack tried to open his pants. He leaned in to suck on a nipple again, kissed his way back to Jack's lips, and fed on them for a minute, before backing up. "You gonna stay dressed?" Daniel leaned against the desk, pulling off his boots, pants coming off as well. He left the underwear on in case Jack decided to pull them off...with his teeth.
Jack grinned as he pulled his shirt all the way off, tossing it aside. "An egg beater, Danny?"
"You make a mean scrambled egg Jack." Daniel chewed on his lower lip, having a difficult time stifling the snicker.
"What?"
"You're afraid of the dentist." Daniel's giggles came full blast.
Jack faced Daniel with a feral look, taking Daniel's face in his palms, pulling Daniel into a searing kiss. He made love to Daniel's tongue, taking it into his mouth, fingers winding tightly in Daniel's hair, deepening the kiss. Jack felt Daniel pulling away, and pushed forward, keeping their mouths sealed. It was only when he felt the nails digging into his back, that he reluctantly let go.
"I thought your mouth hurt?" Daniel pulled his pants off.
"It's feeling *much* better now." Jack pulled Daniel to the floor, kissing him so passionately that Daniel's IQ dropped significantly and then some.
Daniel blinked, trying to focus. But before he could catch a breath, his mouth was taken again. Daniel was pushed backwards, Jack laying atop him, humping for all he was worth. "J-J-Jack...gonna...." Daniel came in his briefs, seed spurting up his abdomen, onto Jack...onto Jack's pants. That thought struck him as funny, but before he could even chuckle, the air was stolen from his lungs yet again.
Jack finally stilled, letting Daniel come up for air. He moved to the couch, undoing his pants as he sat down. Taking his hardened dick in hand, he slowly stroked himself, tongue edging out, licking his upper lip. "Blow me."
Daniel crawled to Jack, placing his hands on Jack's thighs. "Need to get your pants off."
"Just blow me."
Daniel looked up into eyes that were feral again and went down on Jack.
"That's it. Ahh, I love this." Jack carded his fingers through Daniel's hair, holding his head down. "That sinful mouth, your gentle touch, ohhh yeah, those lips around my dick."
Daniel slid his wet mouth up, tonguing the head, hearing Jack's breath hitch. He couldn't resist...."Promise to brush and floss every day?"
"What?"
"Promise me Jack," Daniel's voice was deeper then normal, but with a hint of mischief. "You do want me to finish this, don't you? Want me to suck you off, let you come down my throat?" Daniel stroked Jack's cock slowly. "Jack?"
Jack's head was thrown back, eyes closed, mind somewhere else. All he wanted was Daniel's mouth back. "Anything Danny. Promise. I promise. Whatever you want. Just please, don't stop."
"Anything you want my Colonel." Daniel then proceeded to send Jack to complete and total Nirvana.
After coming with the force of a tsunami, Jack finally remembered to breathe again, stroking Daniel's hair. Slowly pulling Daniel from his spent cock, he leaned in, kissing his lover, tasting himself, moaning into Daniel's mouth. God, he loved it when Daniel sucked him dry. "Sweet Daniel."
"You're a romantic sap, Jack," Daniel chuckled, initiating a deep kiss this time. "And how did I do this time on the dirty talk?"
"You're improving," Jack smiled.
"You owe me a blow-job."
"How about in the elevator on the way out?"
"Not enough time."
"Oh, baby," Jack leered, "I could take you to heaven before we reach the surface." He stood up, taking off his pants, which were full of come. He quickly grabbed Daniel's, putting them on. They were a bit tight, but nothing he couldn't deal with. Putting on his boots, he picked up his shirt, pulling it over his head, and heading for the door.
Daniel's brain finally woke up. "Jack, why are you in my pants?"
"You can't expect *me*, the 2IC at Cheyenne Mountain, to leave here with a wet spot, can ya?" He was out the door, closing it behind him, before Daniel could stop him.
"Son-of-a...." He picked up Jack's pants. "Not only are they too big, he has no belt." Daniel blinked. "What am I saying? He left me with stained pants!" Daniel was still fuming five minutes later, when Jack came back.
"You didn't think I'd actually leave you here like that, did you?" Jack flung Daniel's spare pair of pants at him. "We have to go home together, remember?"
"Oh yeah, I remember," Daniel said, narrowing his eyes.
"Uh, Danny, you have one of those looks."
"Which one Jack?"
"The one that says I'm going to be begging before the night is over."
Daniel finished getting dressed. "Begging isn't all you'll be doing."
Jack put his arm around Daniel's shoulders, the two heading out. "I can hardly wait...."
FIN
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Liked it? Hated it? Lemme Know....The Huntress
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